What I have learned in 2 months of being a mother twins....

First of all, this has been the ride of a life-time so far. There has been so many ups and downs. The downs have been fueled by exhaustion and sleep deprivation and there have been times where I just wanted to walk out the door or throw baby bottles in my father's face (yup, that last thing did happen). But however frustrating things might be at times, they are a million times better when you step back and allow yourself to be swallowed by the chaos that ensues after you have twins. These tiny little creatures are so amazing and I love them more than anything in the world.  

These are some of the things that we did that worked for us.

Everybody I spoke to prior to having my little munchkins said "get them on a schedule." I could not agree more, but in reality schedules have been hard for us to maintain. We do however try to feed them every 3 hours. This was also the case right after we brought them home from the hospital. We definitely make exceptions to that rule on a daily basis, but it is a good goal to work towards. At this point we go longer stretches at night and will usually only have to get up once a night if we time it right (feed at 10pm, 2am and 6am).

From the moment we brought them home, I always kept in mind that I would eventually have to do this on my own at sometime. We were very fortunate to have my parents here to help us for 2 1/2 months (and my in-laws were here more than a month prior to the babies birth.) I will say, take all the help you can get. I believe this is rule #1, when having twins. But that doesn't mean that you should not think ahead. I knew from the beginning that I wanted our babies to sleep in their crib, so for every nap, we tried (with emphasis on tried.) That meant putting them in their cribs while they were still awake but drowsy.

After a particularly rough night in the beginning. Notice what a crib should look like in the handout.

These were the early days. Look at how much space is around them.

Just a few days before transitioning to separate cribs. Notice pee pads and washcloths. 

I knew that I would not have the luxury of cuddling with each baby for hours on end. To this day I still try to get them to go down for naps in the crib, but there are several times where a) they sleep in RockNPlays, bouncy chair or swing or b) it takes me 1 1/2 hr to get them to sleep. At night time they always sleep in their cribs and only every now and then, will one of them transition to the RNP over the course of the night. Our babies shared a crib for the first 2 months and only 2 night ago did they move into separate cribs. Because they were in the same crib and because I did not want to change sheet in the middle of the night because of leaky diapers, we took pee pads from Ikea and cut them into smaller pieces. The babies sleep with a pee pad section under their bottoms (on top of sheet - yes, I know that is frowned upon) and they also have a flannel covered washcloth under their heads (even more frowned upon.) This is what worked for us and I have loved our system.

Night time routine is one of my favorite things. We shower the babies each night and it gives them cues that there is a difference between night and day. We take my old pregnancy pillow (Snoogle) and form a circle. Then lay down those wonderful cut up pee pads from Ikea and a big towel. We call it "Thunderdome" and ask the babies if they are ready for Thunderdome. I think repeating the same words and sentences help them know what is going to happen and they like it. Babies are showered put in the circle and given their bottle. Another ritual is once their diapers are changed, they are "swallowed by Oogly Eyes" - their bath towel. After our night time routine they are put in their crib and will fall asleep quickly while enjoying the sound of white noise. Love the White Noise App, especially the heavy rain. They will be completely calm and there is no fussing at all (hasn't been since the very early days.)

My dad helping with Thunderdome

Babies with their bath towels. 

Simple toys are the most fascinating. Since the babies are now really alert and aware of surroundings around them, it has been interesting to see the things that they really love. Currently the favorites are the ceiling fan and a cowhide draped over our couch. Although there are other favorites too, like "the elephant that picks your nose" and the "monkey with a donut."

Nothing beats beating your sibling in the head - oh, wait I only added the cute pictures!

Do not buy too much or open too many boxes. Although I was breastfeeding in the beginning (that is another post altogether) we are now solely bottle feeding formula. Since I had not planned on bottle feeding, I didn't buy a whole bunch, which I am happy about. This is because we went through 3 different brands, before settling on Dr Browns bottles. In terms of chairs and sitting devices, we quickly found out that our babies had favorites and two of everything was not needed. Joshua liked the bouncer and Caroline the RockNPlay. Most of the other chairs (3 or 4 others - I forget) are just stashed away in another room. In the feeding department, I must also recommend the Babybrezza Formula Pro. It is like a Keurig but for babies. There is nothing better than just pushing a button and having nice warm formula, when you have two babies screaming their heads off. But do remember to do the maintenance on it, or you will have clumpy formula. For a drying rack, we inherited a two-tiered rack that spins which is great since our kitchen is the size of most  people's closet.

Birth Story

Okay, I don't really have time to proofread this - I wrote it a while back, but I just always seem to be running out of time to post things here.

Sunday night I was noticing that my contractions (which I had been having on and off since week 18) were coming about every 8-10 minutes apart. They were painless but I also had a dull backache. I called OB around 9pm and she was not convinced that this was it. She wanted me to try and rest and see if they became harder to breathe through. So I went to bed and slept for a while. Around 2-3am I woke up and my abdomen just felt like it was locked up in a contraction and I just had this fear that something wasn't right with the babies. I called my OB and she agreed that I might as well just swing by the hospital. I took a shower, ate a little bit and brought a nutella sandwich (and boy am I glad I did).

We arrived at L&D around 4-4:30am and I was put on monitors. As the technician was adjusting machine, I had one of my contractions and right after, the girl's heart rate went down really low. The contractions were starting to feel a bit different. Following the stronger contractions girl's HR would dip really low. OB decided to keep me for further monitoring. As contractions got stronger boy's HR started acting up too. I can't remember how low they both went, but every single time an episode happened several nurses would come rushing in. It was decided that the babies likely would not do well under the stress of birth and that we would be having our babies by c-section later on in the day. 

 After hearing this and recognizing that I would be having c-section, my body all of a sudden decided to slow down labor on its own. Contractions got further spread out, which was good because it was scary to watch the monitors during every episode. The various Drs spent a while deciding who was doing the c-section. Around 3pm I was wheeled into the OR and my OB delivered the twins at 3:24pm and 3:25pm. The spinal block was the craziest sensation ever and everything went really fast and before I knew it, I was a mother of two. The room was very busy with 2 NICU teams and who knows how many other people. Spinal block made me so loopy, but hearing those babies screaming for the first time was just amazing. 

Both babies were rushed to assessment. Joshua needed some assistance breathing, while Caroline came out tiny but perfect. Both were brought to me for just a bit before going to nursery and NICU respectively (Josh had some fluids in his lungs). Hubby went with Josh and I just laid there listening to the team work, as they finished stitching me up. It was all very quick, without complications. 

Josh ended up spending 8 days in NICU for a severe case of "being lazy" (my term) and jaundice. He refused to feed and one of the first times I saw him, he was hooked up to IV, feeding tube, 4 different kinds of monitors and a nasal cannula to help him breathe. Things got pretty complicated when Caroline and I were released after 3 days. Fortunately our hospital offered us to room in on a different floor. Days were crazy Caroline was with me in the room and hubby was with Joshua in NICU. I had a really bad case of engorgement in the hospital, but since coming home, my supply has been a constant battle. Caroline is feeding with the aid of a nipple shield and Joshua has finally figured out the whole boob thing. 

The reason for my absence

As you may have guessed, I had my babies!!! And let me tell you, they were not kidding when they said that having twins completely changes your life. First off, I never knew that I could have so much love for someone I just met. These precious little munchkins just fills my heart with joy!!

I will get my act together and post their birth story. But for now I will leave you with these pictures.

34 Weeks

How far along? Picture was taken at 34 weeks exactly.
Total weight gain: This fluctuates like crazy due to water retention. After last week's steroid injection, I gained a whole bunch of weight. Managed to get up to 186 lbs one night (which would put me at 51 lbs weight gain). However the next morning I had lost 4 lbs, just from water that I peed out. At yesterday's appointment the Dr "yelled" at me for loosing weight. My best guess for current weight gain is 43 lbs. 
Maternity clothes? I pretty much just wear loose skirts, maternity tops and sexy compression socks. 
Sleep? Last couple of days sleep has been surprisingly good. I mean besides getting up every hour to pee. I guess my gauge of good sleep has slowly changed - body getting ready for those night-time feeds. I really love my Snoogle pillow. It allows me to go back to sleep instantly. 
Best moment of the week: Hubby's surprise shower at work. Technically that was last week, but since I couldn't mention it then, I will mention it now. I cannot believe I was able to keep a secret, but he had absolutely not idea!!

Miss anything? Being able to do stuff and reach things on the ground. Picking things up from the ground is off limits, unless I want contractions. 
Movements? Tons of movements all the time. Baby girl even managed to flip and is now head down along with her brother. 
Food cravings: Not really terribly interested in food, but need to eat all the time. 
Labor signs: None, except Braxton Hicks. Those babies better stay put for a while still. 
Symptoms: I am a hot swelly mess most of the time. My feet tend to look like balloons at the end of the day. Heartburn, definitely heartburn. And numb fingers and hands. 
Looking forward to: Getting to see my sweet babies, when they are ready. 

A somewhat unexpected turn

So, the end of my 33rd week brought some unexpected events. I went in for my Friday appointment with my high-risk doctor. Thus far, my cervix hard been really long and closed, measuring at 4cm. Well, Friday it had changed to ~2.5cm. My doctor diagnosed me with Threatened Pre-Term Labor and ordered steroid injections to help mature the babies' lungs, just in case. Off we went to the hospital for injections, fetal and contraction monitoring (NST) and some wonderful IV fluids.

This was my very first trip to the hospital EVER. Nothing too stressful and I was happy that I was not in the same situation as some of the other ladies arriving in the triage area of L&D. One lady had fallen on her belly, others were in active labor and screaming left and right. Needless to say I was not their highest concern. Four hours later, we were good to go and got to come back the next day for round 2.

This was Saturday and the triage area was closed, so they put me in an actual Labor and Delivery room. My husband and parents were there, so it was almost like a dry-run for what is to come. While in the room, I heard the lady next door give birth. The baby had a really good set of lungs!!

As we are getting closer and closer to the end of this pregnancy, I can't help but think back. It has been a crazy ride, albeit not as crazy as I thought it would be. With our challenges getting pregnant, I somehow thought that it would follow us in pregnancy, especially considering that I am carrying not just one miracle, but two. Going into this, these scenarios played in my head:

• I was going to loose them prior to viability. We have made it to Week 32, where the babies have close to 100% of surviving. 
• I was definitely going to be on bed rest - perhaps even really early, like 24 weeks or so. Unable to drive, cook, or get ready for babies. Hmm, still out running errands, although I am incredibly slow and have no qualms about finding various places to sit down in the department stores or in grocery stores for that matter. 
• Gestational diabetes was inevitable - not quite sure why I thought I would get it, but I was convinced that my 28 week check-up would have me forced to change diet and perhaps even be on insulin. So far, so good. The office never called me back with my results and I just assumed that everything was normal - I did confirm it a month later. 
• Pre-eclampsia - that darned pregnancy induced hypertension would catch me by surprise and I would end up delivering my precious little babies sooner than expected, perhaps even prior to 32 weeks. This is a fear that will not go away until I hold my precious babies. I have heard of so many women, to whom this happened out of the blue. I have had really good blood pressure so far and check it every time I go to the grocery store. Hubby does keep reminding me to pack my hospital bag, just in case. 
• Babies would not grow enough and would be taken from the womb early to save their lives.So far I think we are in the 40th percentile, so babies are growing and looking good at every scan.
• I definitely expected to be the size of a house by this point in time, unable to do anything on my own. There is no denying that I am big. Every day I venture out of the house, I get these strange looks and comments. Especially the "Any day now","shouldn't you be at home with your feet up?" or "you look like you need a ride to the hospital" Hubby and I measured the belly this weekend and I am measuring at 40 1/2 weeks, so there is that....
• Babies would both be breached and my dream of delivering vaginally would be impossible. We have actually nicknamed the babies. Baby boy is now lovingly called the Gatekeeper - he has been head down right at the exit since we found out the sex of the babies. Baby girl is called Pretzel, as she is always bent in the funniest shapes and forms. At last scan she was transverse, so if all stays as it is, vaginal delivery should be possible. 

I am sure that a ton of other scenarios has come and gone, I just don't remember them right now. Some of these scenarios, of cause, remains a possibility. However, I am embracing the fact, that I have really had a pretty amazing experience being pregnant. Of cause there has been ups and downs, but really the downs have been so few and far in between. I have been incredibly fortunate both in terms of what my body has been able to do and accomplish so far, but also in terms of the support that I have gotten from my wonderful hubby, family, friends, and medical staff. 

Hold on - we are in the home stretch!!!

Weekly update with pictures to come - sorry!!

Oops, i swallowed a watermelon

Well, the weeks are just flying by. Today is 30 weeks + 4 days and I haven't updated this blog for a while. Lots of stuff has happened since last - bulletin style:

• We moved...which I am sooo happy about.

• I have scheduled all my OB appointments until mid September.

• My in-laws came here all the way from California to help us out, for which I am sooo grateful. Even though it is hard for me to sit back and accept the help, I am getting better at kicking my feet up and taking daily naps. MIL and I are about to tackle the laundry. That will be fun to go through the cute baby stuff.

• I have gained a total of 37 lbs, which is just absolutely crazy to me. Most of which is right in the belly area.

• Babies are moving like crazy and sometimes painfully so.

• Additional symptoms include: constant hunger replaced by uncomfortable fullness, replaced by hunger REPEAT!! Numbness in hands at all times if the day.

• Got crib set up in bedroom, complete with mattress - big accomplishment!

And that's all I've got for now!! Enjoy your weekend!